Oh Thank Heaven

[linkimage]Oh Thank Heaven[/linkimage]

Submitted by: dunno source via Oddly Specific

You wouldn’t need food stamps if you used the proper ingenuity.

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47 Responses to Oh Thank Heaven

  1. My Squishee machine is not a toy! Come again!

  2. Dave says:

    Wait… 7-11 takes food stamps? People shop for groceries at 7-11? OMGWTFBBQ!!?!?!?!???

  3. ErmineStoat says:

    YES…*punch* THEY…*kick* ARE!!!!

    Oh, they aren’t a food stamp item? I thought you said they weren’t for sale. Well, never mind, alright then. Sorry about the bruises. They’ll heal.

    Why would you need a sign for that?

  4. Me says:

    Mind you, you can buy a 6 pack of soda with government money. They just had to draw the line somewhere, and doing so at the brain freeze line seemed to make sense.

  5. Eddie says:

    You’re right, 7-11. I need a DRINK STAMP for a Slurpee!

  6. me says:

    try a casino

  7. Anasazi Darkmoon says:

    Sadly, people really are that stupid.

  8. LynzCatastrophe says:

    As someone who was on foodstamps just a little over a year ago i reject this idea! Yes i am aware of how cheap slurpees are but when you have nothing left after rent and paying the much needed electric and water bill there is nothing left for even something as simple as a cheap little treat.

    • 5150 says:

      As someone who was also on foodstamps with my first child, I can tell you I didn’t look for cheap little treats that I couldn’t afford with my own money. Who the hell do these people think they are using everyone else’s tax money for “cheap little treats” when they are meant for surviving the hard times?!

    • B says:

      They are people who get to decide what they want to eat and drink, just like everyone else. Their choices may not always coincide with what you would do. That does not make them wrong. Nor do you alone get to decide what is and is not okay for them to do with their aid, just because a very small portion of your taxes MIGHT have contributed to that aid.

      After all, I am sure some people would have criticized your decision to have or keep a child while on food stamps with an argument very similar to the one you make, along the lines of “Who the hell were you using everyone else’s tax money to have a child you couldn’t afford with your own money? You should have put the child up for adoption for someone who could afford to care for him/her.”

    • robert ot says:

      really b? so even if 1 cent went to feed these folk i shouldnt have a voice if they are abusing it. yes abuse i have NO problem if you get bread,dairy,meats,legumes and such but if your are trying to get a slurppe, they are the type that get fancy cuts of meats and junk food like chips soda etc. i was on food stamps for two months then my situation got better and i stopped them even when i was getting real foods i was also using coupons and getting the store brand whenever possible. even now some fast food place accept them! with the 6 or more dollars you spend you could get stuff to last you at least 2 or more days,should the govt help its people of course but not when there is abuse

    • Not a commenter. says:

      Abusus non tollit usum. (Misuse does not take away (proper) use.) Every system will have people who abuse it. That doesn’t mean that the system should be abolished because of the relatively few who abuse it, rather, the system should be amended to make such abuse impossible.

    • 5150 says:

      That is true, but probably very hard to do. How would you monitor any abuse?

    • diane says:

      You’re really going to compare abusing food stamp privileges to buy a slurpee, to having a child?

      Besides, putting a child up for adoption uses more tax money than food stamps, and chances are, that child will never be adopted anyway. If it is, it would probably be by someone who is just trying to get the money.

      Also, food stamps give people PLENTY of choices for food and drink. No slurpees necessary.

    • JMixx says:

      These days, if you have children while you’re on welfare, your welfare payment doesn’t increase. If you want to have children, no one will tell you not to; the gov’t will just decline to subsidize them. If, on the other hand, you have children while things are going well, THEN experience difficulty and need help, you can get it for you and the children. I agree with that policy. As for what you buy with your Food Stamps, if you wish to survive on Snickers bars and Coke, you can. The standard for whether a food could be purchased with Food Stamps used to be: is it a prepared, ready-to-consume-immediately-after-purchase product? If not, then it is FS-friendly. Warm soda off the grocery aisle? Yes. Cold soda out of the 7-11 fridge? No. Weird, huh?

      And, apropos of nothing, one of the reasons I have no children is that there was never a time when I could afford to. It’s not like I could stop working to stay home and care for one, and, on my pay, I couldn’t afford day care (plus my bills). I would have had to go on welfare if I had had children. So I didn’t have children.

    • rcreek says:

      you truly don’t deserve a ‘treat’ if you’re on food stamps. somehow you need to make your life better, not saying that you’re a bad person for needing assistance, but this is tax money that could be helping someone out instead of rewarding you.

      the welfare system has enough flaws as it is, like letting illegal mexicants to get on it, or allowing you to buy soda and candy.

  9. SpyOne says:

    Thing is, at least here in Virginia, Slurpees ARE a foodstamp item.
    I agree they shouldn’t be, because I always assumed foodstamps were for FOOD, as in: bread, but not doritos. However, you can buy bread or doritos, or soda, or gum. Not coffee, though, because coffee counts as “hot food” (unless you are buying ground coffee to make some your self. No nutritional value, not even calories, but it goes on foodstamps because you eat it.). Cold sandwiches but not prepared hot dogs.

    And yes, I totally get putting a slurpee on foodstamps if you can: that $1.50 may not seem like much, but it’s bus fare to work. When every dollar you make goes to necessary expenses like rent, you either have no slurpee, or you put the slurpee on foodstamps.

    • bionelly says:

      Yeah, here in Ohio it’s mostly the same, except I’m pretty sure you can’t use them to buy gum (candy, yes; gum, no.) They also recently made it so that you can’t buy energy drinks with them, although you can still buy pop. The really strange thing about the “hot food” rule is that our store sells rotisserie chickens, which are available either hot or cold, and even though they’re identical in every other way, the cold ones can be bought with food stamps, while the cold ones can’t.

      And I understand why people might object to buying “treats” with food stamps, but it really doesn’t bother me; yeah, it’s for food, but the amount of money you get is set, and you don’t get more just because you run out, so if you run through it too quickly buying stupid stuff, you’re going to have to use your own money anyway. Even the people I know who are scrupulous about only buying the least expensive version of the things they really need usually end up using all of their food stamps by the end of the month, so I don’t think the people who run through it quickly by buying expensive things are wasting the taxpayers’ money so much as they’re wasting their own (and if they don’t have enough to afford that sort of thing, they’ll probably learn pretty quickly to make the stamps last longer. I’ve run out of food before payday before, and it didn’t take too many times eating dry cereal and ramen noodles before I learned to budget my grocery money better.)

      If they’re only occasionally buying treats that are within their budget, then I don’t see why that’s anything I should get upset over either, because it’s pretty much natural for people to want treats from time to time, and I don’t see a significant difference between buying them with food stamps and buying them with cash which is available for that purpose because the person is buying other things with food stamps.

    • JMixx says:

      No, actually they won’t “learn pretty quickly to make the stamps last longer.” “They” will go to the Food Bank, a local church, or any other resource, and get food there because “they don’t get enough food stamps to last the whole month.”

      I was a Food Stamp (and other programs) worker for about 10 years in various localities in VA, and it used to frustrate me that many of the people who got food stamps couldn’t seem to make them last the whole month, even though their food stamps, which are supposed to *supplement* a person’s income, were more than my total food budget for the month on my income. And I wasn’t starving, believe me. After 10 years, I figured out that about 2-5% of the people who get welfare in this country are temporarily in need, going through a rough time, and will get through it, go back to work, and vanish from the welfare caseload forever. Another 2-5% were so disabled that it was not reasonable to expect them to go back to work. The rest were “career welfare recipients,” were working the system, or just didn’t see anything wrong with collecting welfare for their whole lives. After all, that money doesn’t COME from anywhere, right? The government just prints it to give out, right?

      ~Not that I think the system is broken or anything.~

  10. Sarge says:

    What the heck are food stamps?

    Seriously: I’ve never heard of them before.

    • Ren says:

      Federal aid for low income households that can be used to buy food only. They used to be actual stamps but now they come on a card.

    • wandering through says:

      Gov’ment program… essentially tickets to buy food with.

    • Me says:

      And some people would probably die with out them. Especially if they don’t have family that will help them out when things get tight… Been there done that…

    • Mitsuki says:

      A card with money given to people, by the government, who have little to no income to support themselves and their family. The money is used to buy food so what little they make can pay bills. Overly abused by people with nice stuff in their friends/parents name.

  11. Legene says:

    Ummm… as someone who used to be a cashier at a store that took food stamps, we had to explain to customers that the Easter baskets filled with mostly toys and tiny bit of Candy didn’t count as Food Stamp items.

    • JMixx says:

      WHAT?! They were trying to BUY Easter baskets?! They weren’t lining up at the local church or food pantry to get “their””free” Easter baskets?

  12. Paula says:

    As my dad used to say when I complained that we didn’t have any soda or kool-aid, “Drink water.”

  13. rastaferal says:

    One of the things I find funny about food stamps is that sodas count, but energy drinks (which are sodas) may or may not count, depending on where you are.

  14. Panem et Circensus says:

    Keep ’em poor and in misery – survivial, and nothing more. Oh and their kids too.

    • JMixx says:

      As I noted above, I used to be a Food Stamp worker. Most people’s food stamp *supplement* to their *income* was more than my food budget for the month on my salary. And I wasn’t starving; I just wasn’t eating steak and lobster.

    • derpistan honkeytonk says:

      i eat steak, filet mignon, and fuck tons of seafood almost nightly. because i got it out of the dumpster! no welfare involved… grocery stores throw out the dumbest things..

    • farm-aid says:

      There is so much abuse by the current recipients, and as a food stamp worker, you know who they are. Fortunately in the USA we have such an excess of food, and such a waste of it. We still pay farmers not to grow food and spend billions feeding other countries. There is no reason for anyone in this country to not have all the food they want. EVERYONE who is a legal citizen for at least 1 year should receive an ebt card of a reasonable amount. Then if they are more well off they can fill their cart with the luxuries and slurpees they have earned. Somebody call Oboma for me, I have a brain freeze:)

  15. diane says:

    There is a sign like this at a store close to me, but it also includes fountain drinks, coffee and alligator ice.

    I think anything in a convenience store should be banned for food stamps, unless it’s from the small section of actual food.

  16. Chyna Rose says:

    It’s really stupid that you can buy all the candy and soda you want with foodstamps but no salads or chicken from the deli 🙂

  17. Marvelous Mira says:

    One thing which interests me is that you can buy water with food stamps, when you can get free water in most civilized American cities. The water here, for example, is basically bleach with water in it, but I’ve noticed it doesn’t taste too bad after boiling the garbage out. So you can’t buy something to keep you from overheating (I’m not saying that you should buy slurpees with food stamps) but you can buy something you can get for free.

    More food for thought: you can buy a candy bar, but there’s no government assistance for other necessities such as soap.

    Keep in mind that this is from the perspective of someone who lives off $600 a month in social security for two people. I figure if the government doesn’t give me enough social security, which we have worked for, then they owe me something to keep me alive. That idea might seem a little off, but I work 12 hours a day at a government job, so I don’t have time to contemplate moral questions.

  18. derpistan honkeytonk says:

    i used to work in a 7-11. i made about 800 of these signs. this looks like my handwriting infact….

  19. X6190 says:

    Food stamps are a good thing if they’re for people who actually need them. Sadly, this isn’t the case anymore.

    Example: I live in Mississippi, and I was in Wal-Mart the other day getting groceries. In front of me was a man buying 200+ bags of chips. I know this man personally. He owns his own store, he owns a fairly new vehicle (06 or 07 GMC Sierra), he is buying these chips to sell at his own store. Yet, he uses food stamps to buy every single bag of them. I consider that abuse, because he does make enough to pay rent, truck payments, and still have enough to buy other things.

    Using food stamps to buy a slurpee, in my opinion, would be abusing the privilege of being able to HAVE them. People out there need them, but the people who are mostly just too lazy to get up and get a job (around here, it’s horrible. There will be people who are jobless using food stamps to buy food, when they can “afford” a big house, a new car, new TVs, etc.).

    • Paula says:

      I once watched a guy and his friend shopping at Walgreens who were high (the smoke was still coming off of them). The friend says “I only have a couple of bucks, so I don’t know what we’re gonna get.” The guy says “Oh don’t worry about it, bro. I brought my ebt (CT food stamp) card. It just got loaded.” They then proceeded to fill two baskets with junk food, check out, and leave.

      Meanwhile, I remained abstinent until I was 20 so I could buy birth control, I work a full-time job, and am waiting for the right guy to come along to start a family with who is also responsible and can help provide for us, but I have to pay for this burnout’s munchies.

    • bionelly says:

      I’m pretty sure buying things with food stamps just to turn around and sell them is illegal (or at least, grounds for getting the food stamps taken away.) At least, that’s the way it is in my state.

      And while I generally agree with you that people who can afford luxuries shouldn’t get food stamps, it bugs me when I see people talk about how people on food stamps are “too lazy to get jobs.” I don’t know, maybe I deal with an unusual group of people, but most of the people I know who are on food stamps also have jobs. The jobs just don’t pay very much. I do know at least three people who aren’t employed and are on food stamps, but all of them are disabled, so I still don’t think I’d call them “lazy”. I’m sure there are people out there who do avoid getting jobs out of laziness and then get food stamps, but it’s just not that common in my experience.

  20. yo-dawg says:


  21. Vivian says:

    I can’t tell you how many times I would be cashiering (scraping together pennies and coupons to buy my own food, mind you) and have a customer yell at me because steamed lobster or rotisserie chicken or a single doughnut is prepared food with a tax on it and is not covered by foodstamps. Then when they calm down and swipe their card, they pullout a wad of fifties to pay for their toilet paper and stuff. Yeah. Understandably, I now hate everyone.

  22. Yeah says:

    Yeah, and neither are cough drops, tums, that gift basket with coffee, or your glucose pills. I know you eat them but they aren’t food.
    My family has been on food stamps, and my mother chose wisely what to buy and what not so we could all eat, and not junk food either.
    My personal opinion, candy, ice cream, sodas and any other junk food is a no go with food stamps, it’s for food. You know nutritional stuff like produce, meat, eggs, and the like.

  23. not_write says:

    I work in a grocery store and have to deal with this a lot.

    I don’t have a problem with foodstamps, and the hole “prepared foods” definition being so painfully vague really does get irritating. And I personally find it infuriating seeing someone on foodstamps coming through buying steaks, shrimp, sheet cakes, and other goodies. They have more on their card for food than what I make in a month for food, gas, clothes, school, rent, bills, etc. And then they use what money they actually have to buy multiple cases of beer, bottles of wine and liquor, cartons of cigarettes every week. I’m not kidding, i’m not exaggerating, I’ve been doing this job for 5 years and it’s the same story.

    Now, there are some people who come through that actually use coupons, they budget their money and they treat the State Card like it’s part of their budget and stretch it as far as they can to feed their families taking advantage of sales and coupons like everyone else has to.

    Ultimately, if the option came up, i would vote in full favor of drug testing among a little stricter research into guidelines so that the single working mom of three isn’t thrown off because she “earns too much” to qualify because she’s got three jobs. Meanwhile the guy that comes in smelling of booze and puts back the kids’ cereal so he can afford his 6th case of beer (again, I wish I was kidding) should be scrutinized a little harder.

    the system needs to be reformatted so that people who are milking the system and the tax payers for all that they can get are cut off and those who need help to get through hard times (hell, most of them are just getting their own tax dollars back, let’s be realistic about the good ones!) and are actually trying to get back on their feet. what food stamps covers should be more clearly defined because if you have enough money to fund a birthday party and a kegger every weekend, you do NOT NEED HELP.

  24. Wow says:

    You know people actually do this. It’s bull.

    Too bad you’re no longer to buy energy drinks in my store, assholes.

    Now go buy your cigarettes and lottery tickets with cash like a good freeloading piece of.

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